Alrighty, we shall begin unpacking that wildly enigmatic paragraph of teasers. The first six are: Final. Pack. Late for taxi to airport. Angry lines. Late plane. Trapped in paradise.
Final – Jacelyn took her final and finished her first semester of medical school! Over the break she received the email informing her that she not only TOOK the final, but she PASSED it, as well! So, it’s on to #2 (not to be confused with my prior writings concerning Valsalva).
Pack – That’s where you put your clothes and various belongings in a travel container of sorts in order to proceed to a new destination. For further reading regarding “pack”, please consult THIS PAGE, specifically number 20.
Late for taxi to airport – Our flight was scheduled to leave at 7, so, because of the mass exodus of students, we had to be at the airport at 5am at the latest. As a result of miscommunication between my ears and everything else in the world, we woke up with enough time to scream, change, and drag our puffy eyes down to the taxi. We made it to the airport at right around 5am, at which point we and a hundred other students sat down and waited until 6, which (we found out) was when the airport officially opens and the staff get there.
Angry Lines – After much screaming by particularly frazzled first semester med students, we all did our best Waldorf impression and plodded our way through the ticket line, the “pay us so you can leave” line, the “take your clothes off” security line, and the “you can’t sit in those four chairs; they’re for other people” line. We made it to our gate (one of two) by 7, at which point we were told……….nothing.
Late Plane – We all sat and waited, and waited, and waited. We watched the 7:40 flight leave. We watched the 8:20 flight leave. Still no word. Finally, our 7am flight arrived to get us at 8:35, which, ironically, was the exact time our connecting flight was scheduled to take of an hour away on Barbados. When we arrived on Barbados, no one at our airline’s desks knew that we were late or had any idea what to do with us. In fact, the customs man wouldn’t let us IN to Barbados, since we had no visa or reason to be there; yet we couldn’t get OUT because, well, the plane had left the station. It was much like Hotel California, minus the pink champagne and freaky looking bass player.
Trapped in Paradise – So, missing our connection to Barbados made us miss our connection to St. Vincent, which made us miss our connection to San Juan, which made us miss our connection to Atlanta, which made us miss our connection to Minneapolis. The delay caused us to have to purchase $828 more in plane tickets (when I say “us”, I most definitely mean Ralph Frederick, who is quoted as saying, “Whenever you guys travel, I prepare myself to bail you out”) (Ralph is not only generous, but possesses deep wisdom of the ages). Needless to say, our benevolent airline, though in NO WAY prepared to help us in ANY WAY with the predicament they had put us in by having pilots with an unfortunate combination of procrastination, constipation, and narcolepsy, DID put us up in a small hotel 30 minutes from the airport. I will write much, much more about Liat Airlines in the future.
I’m off to get lining for our curtains so that I can stop freaking out the 4th semester student whose apartment window faces the window that faces the room I face when I’m naked.
If you pray, when you pray, pray for us.
On to the next thing…